8 Psychology Books a Therapist Recommends for Healing and Relationships
By Jordan, Psychologist · · 6 min read
How to use psychology books
Books can give you language for experiences you have struggled to name. They are a great companion to therapy, but not a replacement for it. If a book brings up strong emotions, slow down and take breaks.
Books on trauma and the nervous system
- The Body Keeps the Score by Bessel van der Kolk: how trauma is stored in the body and the treatments, including EMDR, that help.
- Anchored by Deb Dana: an accessible guide to Polyvagal Theory and practical ways to befriend your nervous system.
Books on patterns and self-understanding
- Reinventing Your Life by Jeffrey Young and Janet Klosko: written by the founder of Schema Therapy, it explains lifetraps such as abandonment, defectiveness, and unrelenting standards.
- Self-Compassion by Kristin Neff: research-based tools for softening a harsh inner critic.
Books on relationships and couples
- The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work by John Gottman and Nan Silver: the research behind the Gottman Method, with exercises for couples.
- Hold Me Tight by Sue Johnson: seven conversations to rebuild emotional connection.
- Attached by Amir Levine and Rachel Heller: an introduction to anxious, avoidant, and secure attachment in adult relationships.
- Come As You Are by Emily Nagoski: a warm, science-based book on desire and sexual wellbeing.
Frequently asked questions
What is the best psychology book for trauma?
The Body Keeps the Score by Bessel van der Kolk is one of the most widely recommended books on trauma. Anchored by Deb Dana is a gentler, more practical starting point.
Which book explains Schema Therapy?
Reinventing Your Life by Jeffrey Young and Janet Klosko is the classic self-help introduction to Schema Therapy and common life patterns.
Is there a good book for couples before starting therapy?
The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work by John Gottman is a strong choice, especially if you are considering Gottman Method couples therapy.